2007年9月16日星期日

Family Communion Day

说白了
俄罗斯乌里扬诺夫斯克州的法定交配日

By Chloe Arnold
Russia – Demography – Newborn babies in Rostov-na-Donu, 20Oct2006
Russia has lost 6.5 million people in the past 14 years
(TASS)
MOSCOW, September 10, 2007 (RFE/RL) -- The Russian government has taken numerous steps in recent years to counter the country's demographic crisis.

In central Ulyannovsk Oblast, authorities have adopted a particularly novel approach: encouraging women of child-bearing age and their partners to stay at home on September 12 to procreate.

The initiative comes from the region's governor, Sergei Morozov, who is desperate to boost his region's flagging population.

Morozov told RFE/RL's Tatar-Bashkir Service that in Soviet times, the region boasted 1.5 million inhabitants; today they are down to 1.3 million, and the population is declining by some 12,000 people every year.

"Family Communion Day," as September 12 is officially being called, falls exactly nine months before the nationwide June 12 holiday, the Day of National Unity. Women in the Ulyanovsk region who give birth on that day are being offered prizes, including cars, refrigerators, and cash prizes of up to 250,000 rubles ($10,000).

Looming Crisis

Experts have warned that Russia faces a population crisis over the coming years, because not enough children are being born and mortality rates are high.

Valery Yelizarov, the director of the Center for the Study of Population Problems at Moscow State University, says Russia's population has fallen from 148.5 million in 1993, to 142 million today.

In fact, he says, the population decline is even worse than it looks.

"If you compare births with deaths during that period, the deaths outnumber the births by almost 12 million," Yelizarov says. Although the numbers are compensated in part by immigration, with more than 5 million immigrants entering the country during that period, the population has fallen by 6.5 million people.

Yelizarov blames the steady population decline on high mortality rates, poor healthcare, and the lack of financial means for most families to have more than one child.

Quick Fix?

Government officials have said an improved healthcare system and better financial incentives for women who have two or more children mean the population will level out in less than two decades. Yelizarov, however, is less hopeful.

Ulyanovsk's governor says 28 babies were born on June 12, 2006. This year, the figure rose to 78.

"I don't share the same grounds for optimism as some in the government, who say that over the course of the next 15 years, the population will stabilize," he says. "A very serious problem awaits us in 2010 and 2011, when the number of women of child-bearing age will start to fall."

Another catalyst, he says, is that the population is aging and the shift in balance between those who work and those who are too old to work will have a serious effect on the country's economic growth.

But in Ulyanovsk, some residents were looking forward to Wednesday's unofficial holiday.

Marat is a student, who recently got married. He says he is keen for his wife to have a baby on June 12.

"A lot of people die in our country, and very few babies are born," he says. "I wouldn't have a baby because of gifts or money, but because we need children. A patriot cannot be born in one day; we should teach our children and love them."

Elvira, who got married earlier this year, was less sure that a special state-sanctioned day made the notion of procreation more appealing.

"No, I don't need that. I will have a baby when I am ready," she said. "I will have a baby when God wishes it. I don't want to have a baby for money or gifts, I should be ready for him or her myself."

Bearing Fruit

Morozov, the region's governor, said the initiative, which began three years ago, has already proved fruitful. On June 12, 2006, 28 babies were born in the region's hospitals, he told RFE/RL. This year, the figure rose to 78.

But Yelizarov says Family Communion Day is little more than a ruse.

"I think most people will have enough of a sense of humor not to take this too seriously," he said. "You could call this bureaucratic idiocy; you could call it a sincere attempt to involve people in resolving the population problem. But expecting this to have any real effect on the country's demographics would be foolish."

He says far more serious measures need to be taken to stop Russia becoming the most sparsely populated nation on earth in little more than a decade.


文章最后也提到了,这个措施本身"is little more than a ruse" and "most people will have enough of sense of humor not to take this too seriously". 不过从这个东西多少可以看出俄罗斯现在的状况和人口政策-----记得前几年还有一个俄罗斯的加盟共和国在疯狂的招收外国移民(当然,这个加盟共和国属于俄罗斯比较穷的那种)。

对了,顺便补充一下关于这个加盟共和国的背景资料:

Ulyanovsk Oblast (Russian: Улья́новская о́бласть,中文叫做:乌里扬诺夫斯克州) is a federal subject of Russia (an oblast). It is located in the Volga Federal District. Its administrative center is Ulyanovsk, named for Vladimir Illyich Lenin's family name Ulyanov.

Political Satire: 原来政治可以这么轻松

最近时常看到这个传说中的加拿大“前”政党,犀牛当的介绍:A political party whose "basic credo, their so-called primal promise, was 'a promise to keep none of our promises.'" .

好奇之下google了一下,犀牛党真是很好玩
提出了大量有趣的点子:

Other platform promises released by the Rhinoceros Party included:

* repealing the law of gravity[5]
* reducing the speed of light because it's much too fast,

If elected, the Rhinoceros Party promised to legalise devices such as this
If elected, the Rhinoceros Party promised to legalise devices such as this

* paving Manitoba to create the world's largest parking lot,
* providing higher education by building taller schools,
* instituting English, French and illiteracy as Canada's three official languages,
* offering to retrain those constituents who want to become illiterate by enrolling them in a state educational institution,
* tearing down the Rocky Mountains so that Albertans could see the Pacific sunset, or moving them one metre west as a make-work project,
* legalising pot. And pans. And spatulas. And other kitchen utensils,
* building sloping roads and bicycle paths across the country so that Canadians could "coast from coast to coast",
* making all sidewalks out of rubber to prevent inebriated people from hurting themselves when they fall down
* responding to the energy crisis, reducing energy costs for transportation by moving the cities of Montréal 50 km west and Toronto 50 km east,
* abolishing pumping oil out of the ground as that oil is there to keep the earth moving smoothly on its axis and if you withdraw the oil, the whole thing will grind to a halt,
* abolishing the environment because it's too hard to keep clean and it takes up so much space,
This takes up a lot of space and is very difficult to clean. As such, the Rhinoceros Party pledged to abolish it.
This takes up a lot of space and is very difficult to clean. As such, the Rhinoceros Party pledged to abolish it.
* annexing the United States, which would take its place as the third territory, after the Yukon and the Northwest Territories (Nunavut did not yet exist) in Canada's backyard, in order to raise the mean temperature of Canada by one degree Celsius,
* replacing the Canadian Forces with clones of Vladislav Tretiak,
* end crime by abolishing all laws
* making bubble gum the national currency, so that it could be inflated or deflated at will,
* Making the pop bottle the official currency of Canada as the value went up, not down
* Paving the Bay of Fundy to create more parking in the Maritimes
* Demolishing the Rockies and using the resulting gravel to make a national nature trail
* breeding a mosquito that would only hatch in January so that "the little buggers will freeze to death",
* turning Montreal's Saint Catherine Street into the world's longest bowling alley,
* adopting the British system of driving on the left; this was to be gradually phased in over five years with large trucks and tractors first, then buses, eventually including small cars and bicycles last,
* as an energy-saving idea, putting larger wheels on the back of all cars so that they will always be going downhill,
* selling the Canadian Senate at an antique auction in California,
* putting the national debt on Visa

...four hundred thirty four, four hundred thirty five...
...four hundred thirty four, four hundred thirty five...

* declaring war on Belgium because a Belgian cartoon character, Tintin, killed a rhinoceros in one of the cartoons[6]
* offering to call off the proposed Belgium-Canada war if Belgium delivered a case of mussels and a case of Belgian beer to Rhinoceros "Hindquarters" in Montréal (the Belgian Embassy in Ottawa did, in fact, do this)[6]
* painting Canada's coastal sea limits so that Canadian fish would know where they were at all times,
* counting the Thousand Islands to make sure none were missing,
* running Penny Hoar on a safe sex platform in Toronto,
* running more than one candidate per riding as an MP's salary is certainly enough to support more than one person,
* exploiting acid rain as an electrical energy source by placing dissimilar-metal electrodes in Canadian swimming pools in order to use them as batteries,
* making Canadians stronger by putting steroids in the water,

Under the Rhinoceros Party, this kind of event would have been outlawed
Under the Rhinoceros Party, this kind of event would have been outlawed

* banning lousy Canadian winters,
* moving the Vatican to Saint-Bruno-de-Montarville, Quebec to promote tourism,
* putting the West Edmonton Mall on wheels and rolling it to areas of the country suffering from economic depression,
* turning the Louis-Hippolyte Lafontaine tunnel in Montreal into a free carwash by poking holes in the ceiling,
* transforming the Montreal Olympic Stadium into a gigantic beluga aquarium,
* drafting the Queen Mother to sew up the hole in the ozone layer
* building giant domes over several conservative neighbourhoods to keep the dinosaurs, both real and political, in.
* eventually build a dome over canada to prevent damage from oncoming stars
* annexing Greenland and creating a cartel with other northern nations in order to sell icebergs to the Saudis; the cartel would be called "Snopec",
* digging a canal from coast to coast, by hand, to reduce unemployment; and then, leveling the Rocky Mountains and using the canal to transport the material east to fill in the Great Lakes, in order to expand Canada's landmass.
* impose an "import quota on lousy winters -- Canadians are sick of being God's frozen people. It's time to get back to the four basic seasons: salt, pepper, mustard, and vinegar."
* include the word "fun" in Acts of Parliament, Acts of Provincial Legislatures, and Bylaws of municipalities, from which it was apparently conspicuously absent.
* Build a dome over the Annapolis Valley so they can grow bananas.
* Renaming the country Nantucket

而且他们也不只是是说说,而是实际的参加选举,最高得票记录是在1980年得到110,286张选票,占到当年全国的1.01%,着实是个惊人的成绩,他们的其他战绩如下:

The Rhinoceros Party never succeeded in winning a seat in Parliament. In the 1984 federal election, however, the party won the fourth-largest number of votes, after the three main political parties, but ahead of several well-established minor parties. Rhino candidates sometimes came in second in certain ridings, humiliating traditional Canadian parties in the process. In the 1980 federal election, for instance, the Rhinoceros party nominated a professional clown/comedian named Sonia "Chatouille" Côté ('chatouille' means tickles in French) in the Laurier riding in Montréal. Côté came in second place, after the successful Liberal candidate, but ahead of both other major parties: the third place New Democrat, and the fourth-place Progressive Conservative candidate [7]. Chatouille received almost twice as many votes as the PC candidate.

最让人感动的地方是,这个看似胡搞瞎搞的政党表示:

The Rhino Party also declared that, should they somehow actually win an election, they would immediately dissolve and force a second election.

如果真是这样,那么应该说他们还是在以一种特殊的方式表达对国家的责任感的。不过...如果你把这句话和他们的Primal promise放在一起考虑,那么,可能就会变成一个更大的笑话了。

以上全部内容均来自Wikipedia,如果你希望知道更多,请访问Rhinoceros Party of Canada

如果以上内容依然让你觉得意犹未尽,wiki上还有一个关于全世界搞笑政党的列表:List of frivolous political parties

不过在我看来,这里面最大的Political Satire其实是: 没有一个中国政党入选

2007年9月15日星期六

中国人的姓氏在美国的尴尬(Zz)

小搞的文章

说实话,中国的名字用英文还真是不好发音...

不管是Yuan 还是 Ren用英文读起来都怪别扭的-----其实在国内的时候我就很少用这个名字

在这边我通常让他们直接叫我Cabbage,结果被老板不爽,有一段时间更是因为这个email被他给spam了------其实就算不被spam,他也经常几个月不回我的邮件...人生呀

废话到此,please enjoy...

发信人: janger (漕渡|一直在潜行,遍寻不到), 信区: Joke
标  题: [合集] 你们这个是假笑话,我写个真的
发信站: 水木社区 (Sun Sep 16 01:32:48 2007), 站内

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 EasyGo (LazyCucumber) 于  (Fri Sep 14 19:27:57 2007)  提到:

关于“She”和“He”《世界日报》曾登过这样一个故事:
  有一位姓尤(YOU)的人来到加拿大后,热情助人,经常为新来的中国留学生接站。一次他同时接来一男一女,男的姓佘(SHE),女的姓何(HE)。接来后的第二天系里正好有个PARTY,尤同学想可以趁此机会领两位新人去熟悉一下环境,认识一些朋友,于是就开车带他们二位去参加PARTY。聚会开始后老尤上前给大家介绍新来的同学,怕老外记不住,还把他们的姓氏都给拼了出来 :
  
  先介绍女士:“She is He, HE!”老外跟着重复:“So, She is he?”老尤答: Yes!
  然后指着佘:"He is She, SHE!"老外有点懵:“What, He is she?” 
  尤回答: Right!
  接着指指自己 "And I am You, YOU!" 老外已彻底晕了:Oh, You are me?!


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 oxfox (难得糊涂) 于  (Fri Sep 14 19:32:15 2007)  提到:

有个同学姓胡
同学问
who r u ?

I'm who(hu)?
【 在 iamacat (忙碌ing~~~) 的大作中提到: 】
: laf...我同学叫*皓,在美国留学实验室的人每次跟她开玩笑都是“hao,how r u”




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 wenx (96KHz 24-bit S.D.T.) 于  (Fri Sep 14 19:35:29 2007)  提到:

我们这儿有个Naeem,读作name
被人问名字的时候总要回答半天
【 在 oxfox (难得糊涂) 的大作中提到: 】
: 有个同学姓胡
: 同学问
: who a u ?
: ...................



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 CrossIris (纵使衰人命,牛心永不泯) 于  (Fri Sep 14 19:43:03 2007)  提到:

ge有个女的叫做斯利萍
每次老外都叫她sleeping


【 在 EasyGo (LazyCucumber) 的大作中提到: 】
: 关于“She”和“He”《世界日报》曾登过这样一个故事:
:   有一位姓尤(YOU)的人来到加拿大后,热情助人,经常为新来的中国留学生接站。一次他同时接来一男一女,男的姓佘(SHE),女的姓何(HE)。接来后的第二天系里正好有个PARTY,尤同学想可以趁此机会领两位新人去熟悉一下环境,认识一些朋友,于是就开车带他们二位去参加PAR
:   
: ...................



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 DodoS (幸运鸟|修身养性|闷声发大财) 于  (Fri Sep 14 19:49:03 2007)  提到:

某男叫余发金,去签证
VO: what's your name?
yu: Faking Yu!
VO: Reject!
【 在 EasyGo (LazyCucumber) 的大作中提到: 】
: 关于“She”和“He”《世界日报》曾登过这样一个故事:
:   有一位姓尤(YOU)的人来到加拿大后,热情助人,经常为新来的中国留学生接站。一次他同时接来一男一女,男的姓佘(SHE),女的姓何(HE)。接来后的第二天系里正好有个PARTY,尤同学想可以趁此机会领两位新人去熟悉一下环境,认识一些朋友,于是就开车带他们二位去参加PAR
:   
: ...................



☆─────────────────────────────────────☆
  
 arantxa (哥哥) 于  (Fri Sep 14 20:17:30 2007)  提到:

偶们老板就姓何,每个老外都称之"Prof He"
话说以前的老板姓余,用他浓重的湖南口音说出来就是:I am professer YOU.

【 在 EasyGo (LazyCucumber) 的大作中提到: 】
: 关于“She”和“He”《世界日报》曾登过这样一个故事:
:   有一位姓尤(YOU)的人来到加拿大后,热情助人,经常为新来的中国留学生接站。一次他同时接来一男一女,男的姓佘(SHE),女的姓何(HE)。接来后的第二天系里正好有个PARTY,尤同学想可以趁此机会领两位新人去熟悉一下环境,认识一些朋友,于是就开车带他们二位去参加PAR
:   
: ...................



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 eudemonia (eudemonia) 于  (Sat Sep 15 00:51:32 2007)  提到:

一个日本人姓“留守”,日语里是电话留言的意思。

每次接电话都说:你好,我是留守。

对方通常挂电话。

【 在 EasyGo (LazyCucumber) 的大作中提到: 】
: 关于“She”和“He”《世界日报》曾登过这样一个故事:
:   有一位姓尤(YOU)的人来到加拿大后,热情助人,经常为新来的中国留学生接站。一次他同时接来一男一女,男的姓佘(SHE),女的姓何(HE)。接来后的第二天系里正好有个PARTY,尤同学想可以趁此机会领两位新人去熟悉一下环境,认识一些朋友,于是就开车带他们二位去参加PAR
:   
: ...................



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 Baylor (Triggerhappy) 于  (Sat Sep 15 01:58:41 2007)  提到:

还有x打头的,老外发不出来,听说有一个人三个字三个x打头,结果得了一个外号
porno guy。
tonight show里就拿小胡开心,一个东西上面写着Hu's your dady.背景就是小胡
的头像。
还有拿姓王的搞笑的,一个中餐馆叫big wang。

【 在 EasyGo (LazyCucumber) 的大作中提到: 】
: 关于“She”和“He”《世界日报》曾登过这样一个故事:
:   有一位姓尤(YOU)的人来到加拿大后,热情助人,经常为新来的中国留学生接站。一次他同时接来一男一女,男的姓佘(SHE),女的姓何(HE)。接来后的第二天系里正好有个PARTY,尤同学想可以趁此机会领两位新人去熟悉一下环境,认识一些朋友,于是就开车带他们二位去参加PAR
:   
: ...................



☆─────────────────────────────────────☆
  
 Baylor (Triggerhappy) 于  (Sat Sep 15 02:00:09 2007)  提到:

余福庆更合理,而且不应该是自我介绍,应该是老外读。

【 在 DodoS (幸运鸟|修身养性|闷声发大财) 的大作中提到: 】
: 某男叫余发金,去签证
: VO: what's your name?
: yu: Faking Yu!
: ...................



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 pann (大米饭) 于  (Sat Sep 15 03:13:29 2007)  提到:

我们系一个小米叫Ron, 每次看他接电话就是“Hi, this is Ron(wrong)”,就有点汗,别人难道不会以为他是在说你拨错号了?


【 在 EasyGo (LazyCucumber) 的大作中提到: 】
: 关于“She”和“He”《世界日报》曾登过这样一个故事:
:   有一位姓尤(YOU)的人来到加拿大后,热情助人,经常为新来的中国留学生接站。一次他同时接来一男一女,男的姓佘(SHE),女的姓何(HE)。接来后的第二天系里正好有个PARTY,尤同学想可以趁此机会领两位新人去熟悉一下环境,认识一些朋友,于是就开车带他们二位去参加PARTY。聚会开始后老尤上前给大家介绍新来的同学,怕老外记不住,还把他们的姓氏都给拼了出来 :
:   
: ...................





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 flyinghero (Flying Hero) 于  (Sat Sep 15 09:58:58 2007)  提到:

我来贴一个真实的。
我在日本,我的导师姓胡,日本人互相称呼都是用姓,很少提到名字的。

一次去选另一个教授的课:
prof: Which lab are you in?
me: The 7th lab
prof: So who is your advisor?
me: Yes
prof: (surprised) Who is your advisor?
me: Yes, Hu is my advisor.
prof: (angrily) I am asking you who is your advisor!
me: (laugh)I see. Prof. Hu is my advisor.

【 在 EasyGo (LazyCucumber) 的大作中提到: 】
: 关于“She”和“He”《世界日报》曾登过这样一个故事:
:   有一位姓尤(YOU)的人来到加拿大后,热情助人,经常为新来的中国留学生接站。一次他同时接来一男一女,男的姓佘(SHE),女的姓何(HE)。接来后的第二天系里正好有个PARTY,尤同学想可以趁此机会领两位新人去熟悉一下环境,认识一些朋友,于是就开车带他们二位去参加PARTY。聚会开始后老尤上前给大家介绍新来的同学,怕老外记不住,还把他们的姓氏都给拼了出来 :
:   
: ...................





☆─────────────────────────────────────☆
  
 goodpop (lanny) 于  (Sat Sep 15 11:10:41 2007)  提到:

切,你们这是假笑话
一看就是编的。哪有拿着family name介绍人的
我还是说个真实的
本科同学名“大地”,姓我就不说了
结果来了这里呀,赚了小美无数的便宜
然后小美们一般都是叫过一次吃了哑巴亏,然后打死都不叫他第二次了,嘿嘿
【 在 EasyGo (LazyCucumber) 的大作中提到: 】
: 关于“She”和“He”《世界日报》曾登过这样一个故事:
:   有一位姓尤(YOU)的人来到加拿大后,热情助人,经常为新来的中国留学生接站。一次他同时接来一男一女,男的姓佘(SHE),女的姓何(HE)。接来后的第二天系里正好有个PARTY,尤同学想可以趁此机会领两位新人去熟悉一下环境,认识一些朋友,于是就开车带他们二位去参加PAR
:   
: ...................



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 smileeok (Go Cavaliers!) 于  (Sat Sep 15 11:19:31 2007)  提到:

上课,老师发试卷,好奇地问一个曹姓同学
"What's your last name?"
"Cao!",同学答道。
老师看了看试卷,不解的问
"Kao?" (按英文cao是该念kao)
"No,Cao!"
"Kao?!" (老师发不出来。)
"Cao!"
"Kao?!"
"Cao!"
"Kao?!"
这样你来我往说了好几遍,同学屈服了,"Kao..."

后来该同学做自我介绍都说:"I am * Kao"

【 在 goodpop (lanny) 的大作中提到: 】
: 切,你们这是假笑话
: 一看就是编的。哪有拿着family name介绍人的
: 我还是说个真实的
: ...................



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 daisyrong (小其) 于  (Sat Sep 15 11:32:10 2007)  提到:

我有个朋友,姓溥
别人叫她,Miss Poor。。。
倒霉的名字
【 在 EasyGo (LazyCucumber) 的大作中提到: 】
: 关于“She”和“He”《世界日报》曾登过这样一个故事:
:   有一位姓尤(YOU)的人来到加拿大后,热情助人,经常为新来的中国留学生接站。一次他同时接来一男一女,男的姓佘(SHE),女的姓何(HE)。接来后的第二天系里正好有个PARTY,尤同学想可以趁此机会领两位新人去熟悉一下环境,认识一些朋友,于是就开车带他们二位去参加PARTY。聚会开始后老尤上前给大家介绍新来的同学,怕老外记不住,还把他们的姓氏都给拼了出来 :
:   
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 Baylor (Triggerhappy) 于  (Sat Sep 15 11:44:23 2007)  提到:

这个笑话其实也并不完全如你们所想的那种"占便宜",因为中国人文化里
女孩叫自己daddy,是充大辈。而老外文化里如果对方叫你my son不是占
便宜,而男孩冲女孩叫come to daddy是有sexual undertone,是另外一
种占便宜,所以女孩不愿意叫。

【 在 goodpop (lanny) 的大作中提到: 】
: 标  题: 你们这个是假笑话,我写个真的
: 发信站: 水木社区 (Sat Sep 15 11:10:41 2007), 站内

: 切,你们这是假笑话
: 一看就是编的。哪有拿着family name介绍人的
: 我还是说个真实的
: 本科同学名“大地”,姓我就不说了
: 结果来了这里呀,赚了小美无数的便宜
: 然后小美们一般都是叫过一次吃了哑巴亏,然后打死都不叫他第二次了,嘿嘿
: 【 在 EasyGo (LazyCucumber) 的大作中提到: 】
: : 关于“She”和“He”《世界日报》曾登过这样一个故事:
: :   有一位姓尤(YOU)的人来到加拿大后,热情助人,经常为新来的中国留学生接站。一次他同时接来一男一女,男的姓佘(SHE),女的姓何(HE)。接来后的第二天系里正好有个PARTY,尤同学想可以趁此机会领两位新人去熟悉一下环境,认识一些朋友,于是就开车带他们二位去参加PAR
: :   
: : ...................

: --

※ 来源:·水木社区 newsmth.net·[FROM: 24.2.163.*]




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 lofuture (蓦然回首) 于  (Sat Sep 15 13:06:37 2007)  提到:

以前我哥们在Bosch实习,
他们组有个人叫Mauro Cao,
于是有N多的中国人给他发邮件,
吃饭啊,聚会啊,甚至推销螃蟹的都有。

Mauro Cao很无奈,其实他是个塞浦路斯人。
【 在 smileeok (Go Cavaliers!) 的大作中提到: 】
: 上课,老师发试卷,好奇地问一个曹姓同学
: "What's your last name?"
: "Cao!",同学答道。
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 BeArwen (Arwen) 于  (Sat Sep 15 23:45:42 2007)  提到:

笑话就是图个开心,别那么认真,呵呵

有个在外企实习的mm,问同事她们的foreigner上司叫什么名字
同事回答说:傻根儿~
mm纳闷
后来发现那个外国人叫Sagen


【 在 fengqiaozjt (枫乔) 的大作中提到: 】
: 太假。他只会说she is 喝,不会说 she is 嘿